Small miracles

Thank God for small gifts.
My Italian teacher is supper hot. And the fact that he speaks Italian makes it even better. I kinda want to do well, and just go to his office hours to chat... or have a "good" time. But more likely to just chat.
Also, I got my income tax return check back and I took care of something that I have been trying to get off my back for a while. Now I can go back to being friends.

actions?

why do we do what we do?
I was in the book store today, adn I had to make an exchange. Basically what happened is that I had both my money and the new book in my hands and a recipt that said it had been paid for. I had a vision of how simple it would be to just walk out and call it a day. But I went up to a counter and paid.
Obvously I did the right thing.
But, why did I do it?
Was it becasue I knew it was wrong and wanted to have a clean conciounce? Or was it becasue I was afrid I would have gotten caught? I really don't know. But it doesn't matter, i paid and that was that.

The moral--
some times intentions count. Other times actions count. In the case of criminal acts, it is far more one than the other.

Cook Out

SO, Sam and Page returned from spring break today. It was nice having them back, page brought a very cool lamp which I put up. Also, I decided that we should have a cook out tonight for their return. This is a big thing because it is different than most happening in this household. I made a decision. That never happens. There was the three of us, Matt (BF), Alexia, and James. Now, a short bio about the above.

Me- If you don't know who I am , you need to step back from the site.
Page- Same as above, the roommate and friend.
Sam- Roommie number 2
Alexia- Laughy girl who is the best friend of Sam and a family friend.
Matt- my boyfriend, who I am trying to spend time with before he leaves for Boston.
James- Sam's guy. He isn't her boyfriend, but there is more than just friendship there.

Now, it was nice to have them all over. Matt brought coals for the grill, and everything else was brought out by others... except me.
That is not a new trend. I tend to be the taker in this house. I take from the others, let me rephrase, they all tend to provide... kinda pathetic of me? yes.

Moral of the story--
those who love you are happy to care for you, as well as care about you.

The crab spider

I had a very interesting dream last night.
I dreamt that I was in my room and for some strange reason Matt (other) was also there. Now, the strange thing that happened was that Matt was speaking very softly, and telling me that he has some strange fantasy about me and an blah, blah, blah...
and then in come all these crab/spider things (it looked exactly like this crab, but was more sticklike and more brownish). And I end up killing one and then another gets hit by a car.

i know that is a strange dream, but I looked up what the crabs mean--

To see a crab in your dream, signifies you perseverance and tenacity. On an extreme note, you maybe be too clingy and dependant and hanging on to a hopeless endeavor.

Interesting. I think it odd that he should appear in this dream, after all, I assume that the sexual desire that I have for him to be a power struggle, but, what he said and all that other stuff leads me to believe that it is a an emotional thing.
I think it best to not do anything that might compromise a professional relationship.

Moral of the story--
When you think you know a relationship, you are dead wrong. Relationships will surprise you. And the best you can hope for is the sweet end of the lollipop.

opinions?

Which one is best?

the birth of a land

I am starting a new project... panorama.
That is not as easy as it seems. It requires a seemless blending of two pictures that are created independantly and linked by me writting numbers down on a post it (or two).Here is the first render.

walk on water

an older remix I did a while ago.
http://www.fileden.com/files/2007/3/20/907375/Dragonstea%20Din%20Tei%20(Trece%20Mix).mp3

Numba numba

I made this in the middle of the night and just finished the re-render this morning, so here is the final song.

http://www.fileden.com/files/2007/3/20/907375/Dragonstea%20Din%20Tei%20(Trece%20Mix).mp3

Xmod

http://www.x-fi.com/products/xmod/feature.asp
go ahead and click it.

singing

I like my singers a certain way.
I like my men to sing slowly and in a low octive, but powerfully.
I like my women to sing high and powerfully, speed doesn't matter.

that is just what i like.

lyrics

take my hand, I'm a stranger in paradise.
--wait...
Give me your hand, I'm accustomed in reality.

I haven't been sleeping much lately, but the sleep I do get has been plagued by bad dreams. mainly dreams where normal things i do are multiplied to terrible tasks. Yes, I have nightmares about errands and housework. I had a dream a few days ago where Nadine had chewed her leg off and I wanted to hide it from page so I tried to clean up the leg in the middle of the living room. luckily, the leg was pretty much one piece. I also had a night terror that I was in the bank and they told me that someone had robbed the bank, but only took the money from my account so FDIC won't cover the robbery... it was odd to say the least.
Oh, and the one where my laundry kept catching fire in the dryer... that one was odd. The air from the blowing dryer kept stuff burning and destroyed all my clothes (I magically made all my laundry fit into the dryer in one load... probably why it caught fire.)