Bad Karma

I'm stirring up some bad karma.  I should let it go, cut off the head of the beast.  I don't need evil thoughts in my head.

An enemy

Oh look! I've made an enemy in the lighting world!   Or moreso,  he's made an enemy out of me... but I guess it's better that we got this figured out before I showed him any of my designs. I got what I needed from him: a benchmark.  I know what I'm up against in NYC.  And I've realized that I might not use the same tools as everyone else, but that isn't a weakness of my company.   I use a different approach than most, which allows me to solve problems differently.  Its gotten me a few awards so far, and it keeps my trouble shooting skills honed.  I guess what I'm saying is: it allows me to invent new systems,  not just regurgitate what the other designers are already doing.  So in a way, I'm glad I don't have everything the other guys do: else I would never have invented my circuit movers, inline dimmer packs, or all the LED fixtures.
I know what I must do next; create a chandelier and finish my "Feeling Good Feelings" design.  I have sought the advice of graphic designers,  IT systems guys, event planners, and many other professionals in related fields.  My differences make my designs individual.

My skill level

Nothing feels better than the praise of peer review.  And nothing feels more hollow than  encouragement from people who don't work in the industry.  I recently met a lighting designer who is very talented.   He is my same age but has accomplished so much more... he has even taught.  I feel like a really shitty lighting designer when I hang around with him.  And everyone I tell this too tells me that I am great and all that... but none of those people are in the industry so they don't know how easy it is.